sometimes i like to pretend that i don't really exist. but then when reality hits, it's like a kick to the teeth.

Have you ever felt like you need to kick the front door open, storm outside, and scream as loud as humanly possible until you collapse from exhaustion?
It's crossed my mind a few times, but I suppose my neighbors would probably have me arrested, so I haven't tried it yet.

"The closer you get to the light, the greater your shadow becomes." -Anonymous

This concept has vexed me since I had first heard this, just about a complete decade ago. The more good things I do, the more bad things I justify in my actions? For me, there is no desire to justify any wrongs that I may have committed, Because whatever I have done has just built me up to who I am today. Although I am curious, in what way does my shadow grow? Does it effect my influence, my following, my ability to commit evil acts, or what? What I have come to realize about the former quote is that it shows the direct balance between light and dark, with more light comes more dark, and without light, there are no shadows at all. So I think the biggest question here is, How big do I let my shadow get before it engulfs me?

That person in the mirror, looking back at you... that is who you are, there is nothing you can do to change that reflection completely. Before you act, think, because when you consider the path before you, you might find it beneficial to take the scenic route, whether it's a further walk or not.

One night last July

I was sitting on the curb a few blocks away and the sky was so clear, so we got onto the topic of what could be out there. And as we got deeper and deeper into the subject, the ideas that we were throwing around seemed to get more and more confusing. The idea that maybe even bothered me the most was... "Okay so, we are sitting here and the stars are all out, we see the stars as little specks in the sky, nothing more than a visually attractive piece of nothingness. But think of it the other way around, on one of those little specks millions of lightyears away, there are two kids sitting on a curb, looking up at the stars, looking back at you, but you aren't significant, you aren't anything more than an illuminant in the night sky"... How important can one person be, if they don't take into consideration how important everything else should be?

Some people don't like the rain, but I never understand why, sure it get's nasty out sometimes and sure it can dissipate plans, but have you ever listened to the rain fall on a window sill, with the lightning crashing in the background?

And it may not be raining today, but this should be taken to heart. Next time it rains forget about how it has impeded you in any way and just enjoy the sounds, because you can never understand how the world works, without listening to it all the time.

Remember when?

Being a little kid, I always knew that eventually I'd grow out of everything that amazed me and that new things would catch my eye. Now, being 16 i've realized that although the former is true, the things i had found amazing when i was 6 still capture my interest, the only problem being that there is a fine line between whether or not this is acceptable or whether giving in to the childsih urges one has come to acquire over years of being "caged" into a responsible mindset, is in fact not acceptable and should be repressed along with many other things deemed unnecessary once you hit "maturity". Lately this has confused me because although the things going on in my life are in fact interesting and do keep me happy and amused, there seems to be a background need for something a little more childish, most likely because the fun had as a child was completely careless, as to the fun one is able to have whilst growing up is more directly emotional, and also involves having money to go out.